Pfunksfoolosophy

Some of you know by now that I am a 6 year old masquerading as an adult. Some of you know that I am sillier than Robin Williams on nitrous. Well, a LOT of you probably don’t know this: I can’t have hard candy without being seated. Why is that? Well, it’s because it makes me a little ‘juicy’ and then I start choking. The fear usually reserved for parents of a toddler is still in play for me because I have no idea how to control my ‘juiciness’. So, imagine my surprise when I discovered that I CAN eat a hard candy while walking down the street.
Here’s what happened: I went to Duane Reade (a local pharmacy chain in NYC…kinda like CVS) and they had those huge Lifesavers on sale so I bought some for the ‘office’. Some patrons have dragon breath and sometimes I KNOW I do…anyway, I couldn’t wait-such was my mania about those HUGE wintergreen flavored treats that I tore the bag open and popped one into my mouth, completely forgetting about the juice factor.

Well, I walked…even spoke on my mobile phone and I learned to control my saliva! That may not seem like a big deal to you, but I feel as if a great weight has been lifted. I’m a BIG GIRL NOW! Soon, I’ll be able to go to a public restroom unaccompanied.

Yep, I’m an idiot. Send help.

I can hear you saying it, ‘Poor kid. Hope she gets home okay’

Thanks for the support.

Dude, seriously…I think it’s the hole in it that gives me a chance to catch my breath, if you will.

Hmmm…one day, I’ll be a real girl… just like Pinocchio. But not like Lampwick, who we all know as Matt Damon. That’s a blog entry for another day.

I’m off to have another Lifesaver. Maybe I’m pressing my luck.