Pfunksfoolosophy

One of my favorite human beings passed away. He wasn’t just an actor to me. He was deeply woven into the tapestry of my consciousness through his philanthropy, kindness, humor, intellect and quite obviously, his talent.

Paul Newman was one of the few “movie stars” who weathered every storm with grace and integrity. There are not many left, I tell ya. He was part of the Civil Rights Movement, he established The Hole in the Wall Camp for ill children…the man rocked like no other. He had the good sense to marry Joanne Woodward. 

A friend of mine had the chance to meet him–by chance. My pal was getting beer at a local store (I’ll not say where) and in walked Paul Newman, also picking up some beer. They’d purchased the same kind and my friend made a comment like, “You’ve got good taste, Mr. Newman.”
Paul replied, “I can remember the label. I’m old and habits die hard, kid.”
My friend countered with, “I was talking about your wife. I’ve had a crush on her since I was a kid.”
Newman laughed and clapped him on the back. “I’ll be sure NOT to tell her. Can’t let  her  get a swelled head.” They both chuckled and my pal walked out with him into the sun.

They shared some conversation and they went their separate ways. Instead of blurting out the whereabouts of a screen legend, my pal told few people. There were “Newman sightings” but they didn’t come from him. He wanted to keep that memory for himself.

Later, when he told me about it he said that he couldn’t  help but feel he’d had a brush with American royalty. He’d wanted to hang out with Paul Newman all day, talking about cars, food, beer…whatever, but he knew that as gracious as Mr. Newman was, it would have spoiled everything. He’d gotten to experience that brief exchange and it was enough.

I have to admit, I was a bit jealous. Paul Newman was my guy, ya know? The Sting, Butch Cassidy, Paris Blues, The Verdict…the man could do it all. Who can forget Slapshot? The finest movie ever made about hockey and who made it come to life? Paul Newman.

When he retired from filmmaking I was saddened, but I know that he felt he only had a couple of movies left in him. He didn’t want someone telling him that he’d overstayed his welcome. For me, he was always welcome. He could have just sat in a chair in any film and I would have been happy as a clam, but I’m glad he left films on his terms.

It’s a new kind of movie star these days. He’s not and he would never be a part of that. He had class and grace that I’m sad to say we’ll not see again.

I hope he is resting easy. I hope Joanne Woodward will be able to move forward, alone but not lonely. I hope we never forget what a great man he was and how his example is our template for doing good works because we can and must, not because we’re looking for some notoriety…no car giveaways for Newman, right? Lifelong philanthropy…that’s the ticket.

Man, I’m gonna miss you Mr. Newman. Rest easy.

My heart and prayers go out to his family. May you find peace and comfort.

We’ll get back to our regularly scheduled ranting tomorrow.

People…have you really gotten a load of Sarah Palin  lately? I mean REALLY. She’s not that bright, guys. No, seriously. She’s not. No. I’m not joking. She called Henry Kissinger naive for crying out loud. Kissinger. You know, the slowtalking, semi-lecherous henchman of Nixon’s. Mind you, barring all of that, he’s a smart guy. Very smart.

Here’s the link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ilan-goldenberg/palin-calls-kissinger-nai_b_129445.html

Homegirl needs to crack open a book or something. She’s also got to speak to someone about that nasal thing she’s got going on.

But, I digress. We’re in trouble. Please, let’s shake things up, shall we? Get informed. It’s a shame that my three year old may in good fact have just as much experience as Palin. I mean, he’s  SEEN  maps of foreign countries and he speaks a foreign language. Hey, he’s got MORE experience. Mind you, the foreign language is his own made up language, but he’s shown more initiative than she has.  At least he makes the effort every day to learn something new. Sweet mother…come ON, Sarah. COME ON!
In other news: I am in love with Paul Begala. He laughs me. And he is smart.

Mind you, I still carry a torch for Viggo–but he’s also smart. And he laughs me as well.

See, I’m trying to turn this post around. I can’t get so political. It makes my soul ache.

Sooo…back to the hilarity…In October I will be appearing in The Vagina Festival. Not only do I have one, I’ll be talking about it. If you’re in NYC, please check it out. Loads of fun.

You can probably check out the website. If I could remember the link, I’d post it.

Let’s see…oh, by the way…Pooper is a genius. I just wanted you to know that.

Oh! Kim Kardashian on Dancing with the Stars…that poor kid. I really think she is so embarrassed about being on the show that it’s killing her. Here’s  what I think happened with that one: Her sisters and her mom got her all hyped up telling her how much fun it would be and she got all worked up, completely forgetting that PEOPLE would be there and that she would be seen (much like her sex tape, poor kid) and then, once it all started she was  like, “Waitaminute, this is real!” (kinda like Mia Farrow in Rosemary’s Baby)

That kid is sooooo out of her  element. I believe that she’s shy. I mean, I don’t think she’s talented or slimy enough to actually snow the American public. She’s in over her head and she looks like she wants to cry, so I may have to watch the show just to root for her. I want to give her a hug and a bathrobe. Aww, the poor kid. Ya know, I saw an episode of her family’s reality show  where she was crying and one of her sisters was making fun of her crying and I have to tell ya, that laughed me. They’re like my family. If you look stupid crying—chances are we’re gonna goof on ya. Ah, the Kardashians. Gotta love  ‘em.

You ever notice that Armenian and Lebenese women are usually really, really beautiful? OR not so nice-a nice looking. Feast or famine, ya know? But the guys? Eh.

Hm.

I’ve digressed enough. Keep on truckin’.

You guys all know that I am easily amused. Lately, it’s been tough going what with my political ranting. That can’t be helped. We’re in a world of hurt, Americans. BUT, this post isn’t about that. It’s about things that really get me going in a good way.

Craig Ferguson amuses me no end, but I’m a little upset that his taped pieces aren’t that funny. They border on absolutely boring, but I have a little crush on that wee sexy bastard so I forgive him. I’m also very amused that he’s now an American citizen. That makes me happy. Just hope he doesn’t lose that nifty burr of his. It’s not as thick as it used to be but what is these days?

John McCain’s descent into complete doddering crazyman. I love that interview regarding Spain. Oh, brother he needs a nap. Let him rest, guys.

Pooper is only three years of age and he’s riding a two wheeler now…mind you no training wheels. WHOO HOO!

Let’s see…cherry flavored Pez.

Okay, that’s about it.

Gang, I watched Sarah Palin’s speech last evening. Here’s the thing: She was preaching to the converted. She rallied the troops using all of the tactics she was accusing the left of doing. Perfection. It was like watching “Dynasty”. The catty remarks, the lack of substance, that “aw shucks, I’m from the sticks” business when she is a social climber like you read about…come ON, people. You don’t need a Master’s Degree in Political Science to see that this is all about the spin.
How about characterizing “them”, whoever “they” are, as sexists? Hey, Shortstack…try to stop referring to yourself as a “hockey mom” and maybe we can see past it. They’ve set the stage so that when the debates start, any hardball will look like bullying. She will be able to get all the digs in that she can, without actually giving us ANY pertinent information regarding the issues and Joe Biden will have to try to box with his hands behind his back.

Now, that isn’t to say that Joe Biden isn’t up for the task because I believe that he is…it’s just that watching CNN lastnight and witnessing Campbell Brown, a journalist I sorta liked gush about how moved she was when Palin spoke about her family made me sick. Now, the media has never been the darling of the Republican Party, but John McCain was always good for an interview and a juicy soundbite. Oh, he’s crazy as a shithouse rat, but somewhere in there is a heart. That’s all over now.
The enemy is the media–all LIBERAL. Yep, every doggone one of ‘em. Nope, I don’t think so. It was fairly evident that once Palin said “I’m not gonna play with you guys” some of the journalists (yeah, you Campbell) nearly wept and begged forgiveness.

Palin’s speech was deemed “shrill” by the Senate Majority Leader. I’ve got a newsflash: It WAS. That’s not sexist, Campbell…it’s accurate. Give it a rest already. By the way, Sarah…if you’re reading this…your voice is very much like a rusty gate. Work on it. You’re going to be stumping all over this great nation. Do something about that whine you’ve got going on.

You know, I wonder if Campbell and others would have defended Hillary Rodham Clinton? I mean, she was called a bitch countless times in print, on radio, on television. Hmm. Maybe it’s because she’s older and not as cute as Sarah Palin. Maybe it’s because some women are chauvinists and don’t even know it.

Speaking about being sexist: did you guys get a load of the buttons they had on? “The hottest VP from the coolest state”. Umm, whaaa? That’s not sexist? Shut the heck up and don’t even bother using that as a defense. Not one more doggone time.

I don’t care that she’s a mom. I care that she has no business in the White House. I don’t care that her kid is pregnant. I care that if her parents had prepared her with something other than abstinence, she might have made some informed choices. I care that Sarah Palin is a woman who is Pro-Life. I care that she has little regard for things beyond her ken.

I care that John McCain, a Vietnam VETERAN, a POW for crying out loud, hasn’t done one thing for veterans. Not one. He’s actually denied them their due. I’m sorry that he sustained lifelong damage from his imprisonment, but that is war. He’s alive. What about the other guys who never made it back and didn’t reveal anything to the enemy? Or the guys who made it back and are still in pieces? What’s that Johnny boy? Screw them? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Pfunk is fired up, friends. I usually keep my politics to myself, but now…it’s getting dangerous.  It’s getting wild. I want our daughters and sisters to have ownership on their reproductive rights. I want our veterans to be WELL taken care of down the line. I want to know that some day every American will be able to afford to take their sick child or their sick spouse to the hospital and receive care and not lose their homes. I want to be able to BUY a home for cryin’ out loud.

If you’re reading my blog, ya gotta know that I’m all about love and inclusion. I don’t agree with the Right, but I am bound to love them. Maybe that’s what really burns ‘em up. It’s far easier to keep hate alive. Welp, that ain’t gonna happen. Not on my watch.

So, gang of foolosophers, exercise your right to dissent, exercise  your right to vote, get involved, make your voice be heard and for goodness’ sake, LET YOUR FREAK FLAG FLY!

Sick of the Republican National Convention? Feeling betrayed by the Dems? Tired of all of the rhetoric?
Check this out:

http://www.inews3.com/topstory.php?id=5046554e4b7c54484520464f4f4c4f534f50484552

My name is Pfunk and I approved this blog.