Don’t celebrities have mirrors?
I meant to blog about this yesterday, but it slipped my mind.
A friend of mine and I were standing outside our favorite watering hole in the West Village. It was dusk, which is my favorite time of day due to the favorable lighting, and we were watching the police’s traffic unit hook up a Jeep to their tow truck. What made it particularly entertaining is that we assumed that the owner of the truck had to have been an entitled person of means because he/she parked directly next to a fire hydrant. Either that, or they were completely ignorant about parking rules.
The owner of the Jeep parked in front of the very tony workout establishment called ‘Equinox’. Many celebrities in the area work out there. We watch them while eating potato chips or other snacks. I like to have a milkshake if I can afford it. Sometimes we toast them if they catch us gawking. It breaks up the day for us.
Anyway, as we’re making our snarky, witty commentary, who should approach from around the corner but Ethan Hawke. My friend spotted him first.
My friend: Check it out, Ethan Hawke has ice cream all over his face and he just threw the cone away.
Me(turning to look. then laughing): No way!
As Ethan approaches (I am laughing and laughing) my friend says, ‘What’s wrong, dude? Didn’t like the cone?’
Ethan (making the blech face and wiping his face with his hands):ICK!
The man could have used a good scrubbing. I don’t think his teeth have seen an abrasive cleanser since the Reagan administration. And the hair. Pulled back into a rat’s nest ponytail. I had never seen one before. (I am amazed. )
He was also wearing orange track pants. Neither my friend nor I enjoyed looking at them. Yep, we made sport of him. That’s our way.
Ethan took it in stride, G-d bless him. He shrugged and went on his messy way, wiping his face with his already sticky hands
You’d think that he’d wash before he goes out in public. He has kids. Lead by example, I say. I hope they don’t smell like urine. Or worse. I’m thinking of sending him a little gift basket when I get the means.
Poor kid. Hope he gets home okay.
May 6th, 2007 at 5:35 pm
It was 1991 when I began to refer to Ethan as “The Great Unwashed”. Poor guy. Soap just isn’t his hobby.
Not that I would turn the guy away. I’d just have to wash him like a puppy from time to time.
May 8th, 2007 at 4:51 am
Dude, if you saw his teeth you would turn him away. He needs more than the puppy wash. I have to say this about him, though: he was friendly enough. That ‘blech’ face was priceless.
Poor kid. Seriously, I DO hope he gets home okay.