Pfunksfoolosophy

My First Post—I’m bursting with fruit flavor!

Well, as you probably know from reading the ‘About Me’ section of this blog,  I am single and I am a performer. It’s not as exciting as it sounds due to the fact that I am mainly unemployed. My chosen vocation pays the big money when you get a big deal. The big deal is eluding me and just out of spite, I am eluding IT.

See how it likes THAT!
I do freelance work, which pays the bills but I’m looking for a sugar daddy.

Ideally, he will be a sickly older man who has no children or living relatives.

He will have a deep and abiding love—nay, passion for me.

He will not expect me to go all the way with him unless I am sufficiently drugged or drunk. This will cost him extra in the long run, so I think he would be better served by adhering to a few small rules.

The first of which is: Look but don’t touch. Unless it is to hand me cash, then you’ve got a little window of opportunity.

 I’ll get to the rest of the rules later. That one just needs to be out there.

Truth is, I am not equipped to Anna Nicole some poor sap. I guess when all is said and done you do reap what you sow. Karma already has me on speed dial; I don’t need any courtroom hijinx.

I’m thinking that this blog will cover just about everything I can think of about dating, love, sex, kids, music, people watching and possibly the occasional epiphany.

They’re underrated, epiphanies.

We should have more of them and we should speak about them.

They’re like finding a twenty dollar  bill in a pair of jeans right before you wash them.

What a feeling.

This entry was posted on Friday, April 27th, 2007 at 2:30 am and is filed under Life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.