The best thing about having friends
Last night before I went to sleep I thought about how truly happy my life is, in part because of the great friends I’ve made and fostered over the years.
A very dear friend of mine and I were talking after viewing “The Two Coreys” (my new guilty pleasure) and our laughter far outweighed any heavier subjects that we delved into, but that was what was so cool. We easily, seamlessly glide off into different subjects- tangents, really without a thought about whether the other person will take offense.
Friends, real, true friends know one another well enough to care about what the other has to say. We may not agree and quite frankly, most of my friends are quite a bit more conservative than I am, but we are bound by love. Deep love for one another that is unconditional. Unconditional love isn’t a new concept, but it is something that most folks have a hard time grasping. “I would love him so much more if he would just-insert behavior}, “She’d be so awesome if she’d just…” That’s not what it’s about. Either you love the person or you don’t. Simple as that. Love is unconditional. “LIKE”, well that’s another story.
The great, best thing about having friends is that you can dump the crap that you have sitting on your heart at their doorstep and they can make the choice to help you sift through it or not. They can be strong when you’re feeling weak…for you, because of you and unconditionally. Usually, they’ll never bring it up unless you do. Friends can cheer you up or they can fan the fire.
With your closest of friends sometimes you are the flame fanner. I know that because of my capacity to empathize I often make things worse by inciting them to greater heights of anger. It happens. We laugh about it. Particularly my best friend and I. She’ll go off about something that happened and I’ll chime in a comment or two and realize I’ve just made her even angrier and I have to say, ‘Whoa, I’m pouring gasoline on it, huh?’ She’ll laugh and call me a ‘fire fanner’ and we’ll move forward. Even that is funny. You’re so linked to that person that you feel for them. Sure, you’re not helping much, but you’re there.
Yep, you can get on your friend’s nerves, they on yours…hell, you can even get on your own damned nerves. Take my word for it, I’ve gone a couple of days not speaking to myself for my behavior. I’ve had to break up with myself. But the thing is, you still love your friend no matter what. There is very little that someone you love can do to make you STOP caring about them, stop LOVING them. You may need to take a time out every now and again to get your bearings. It’s natural. We’re all growing. Hopefully, we’re evolving into beings who are more understanding, sympathetic, empathetic and tolerant.
Growth is good. Try it on. It’s always changing to suit you.
August 6th, 2007 at 10:02 pm
Um, I do indeed get on my own nerves. I am on my own nerves right now. I would slpa myself, but I’m pretty sure it would make me cry. Oh well, have to show some sensitivity.
MrsH, coming atcha from the steam tent thing.
August 6th, 2007 at 10:18 pm
Last night was the first night I had seen the two Corey’s and I loved it. I’m gonna have to remind myself to watch it. I started worrying about Corey H. when he started having heart problems.
August 7th, 2007 at 12:02 am
We’ll all have to get on google and do a chat OR make up a chat room for The Two Coreys.
Sadly, we three need to get an outlet of some sort.
I thought that Corey H. was experiencing anxiety, but then I thought about the kinda damage that kid has done to himself and I quickly thought,’Oh no…not now…he’s SOBER’
eh. I hope that kid gets home okay. Maybe I’ll have to send him a care package.
In the form of his new girlfriend…ahem.
Sweat lodge in the form of a google chat? I think that works…hmmm…we’ll have to investigate.